The playoff rosters are set, the trade deadline past, and contenders picked up veteran players discarded by the dregs of the league. Every championship in recent memory has been subsidized by solid role players. Sometimes they come in the form of the clutch shooting Robert Horrys, the dynamic scoring Vinny Johnsons, the aging Bill Waltons, or the scrappy glue-type do-it-all James Poseys. Every once in a while they will make your clutch game winning shot, a la Big Shot Bob. However, the main role of these players is not to win the game, but to get the baton from the starters and pass it back to them in a position to win.
A good bench doesn’t need to be full of multi-dimensional players, just players who do one thing well, don’t have an attitude, and know when to get the hell out of the way when a superstar is going off. Yet for a team to overcome playoff injuries (or one of the 50 that have already happened this season) a team must have the right parts assembled-and I don’t just mean a Flip Murray-type who scored big one game then shoot your team in the foot the next. It’s also important for a team to get deep in the playoffs that their starters don’t have to play 42 minutes a game to sweep the Milwaukee Bucks in the first round.
–Benches based on ESPN Depth Charts*
10. Detroit Pistons
Point Guard Will Bynum; Shooting Guard Allen Iverson Arron Afflalo Alex Acker; Small Forward Walter Herrmann; Power Forward Amir Johnson Walter Sharpe; Center Jason Maxiell Kwame Brown

Without naming names if I just said a bench included a future Hall of Famer, two forwards, 6’11 and 6’9 respectively that can rebound and block shots, an undersized forward who can jump out of the gym and ignites the crowd, a foreign forward who can shoot and plays as if he’s on crack, and a young guard who seems to be able to get to the rim when he wants, you’d say that was a pretty could squad. But Kwame Brown and Amir Johnson are worth the hubcaps littering Grand River road at this point-as disappointing as it is to write that about Amir. Maxiell is solid in limited minutes and comes up with some “holy shit did you just see that” plays, but his inconsistent production will keep him from getting more time. And until we know for sure how happy Allen Iverson is coming off the bench-which is what should have happened from the start-there is no way they can be ranked any higher, or succeed in the playoffs.
9. Cleveland Cavaliers
Point Guard Daniel Gibson Eric Snow; Shooting Guard Wally Szczerbiak Sasha Pavlovic; Small Forward Tarence Kinsey; Power Forward Joe Smith J.J. Hickson Darnell Jackson Ben Wallace; Center Lorenzen Wright
Raise your hand if you could ever be quoted saying, “They are probably better without Ben Wallace.” First the Pistons, then the Bulls, and now the Cavs. Ben Wallace is like your grandmother who keeps falling down the stairs and breaking her hip; stop going down stairs if you keep falling grandma; and Ben, please retire before your stat line reads 0 points, 0 rebounds, 0 blocks in 20 minutes of play. While Ben’s injury might clear room for Varejao to get more minutes-I just stabbed myself in the eye with my pencil-Cleveland still has trouble rebounding (see Friday’s loss to Boston, and they only out rebounded Miami by one, does Miami even have a center?). Gibson and Szczerbiak give them deep threats and Joe Smith can still contribute, but isn’t the big body they need down low.
8. Denver Nuggets
Point Guard Anthony Carter Jason Hart; Shooting Guard Dahntay Jones Sonny Weems; Small Forward Linas Kleiza Renaldo Balkman; Power Forward Johan Petro; Center Chris Andersen Steven Hunter

“Dear Lord, Please keep Chauncey healthy”-signed Denver. OK so the people of Denver really didn’t invoke a deity’s help, yet. JR Smith’s move back into the starting role knocked the Denver bench down a few notches. The Nuggets’ bench offers shallow depth to their team. They have several players who play double digits minutes per game, and on the stat sheet provide little tangible evidence they were even on the floor (mainly from the backup guard positions). However they do get good energy and quality rebounding from their big men. Chris “The Birdman” Andersen looks as if he might have stopped doing lines of coke after every game, and has become nearly as entertaining as when he was shooting up.
7. Chicago Bulls
Point Guard Kirk Hinrich Lindsey Hunter Shooting Guard Anthony Roberson; Small Forward John Salmons** Power Forward Tim Thomas Center Brad Miller Aaron Gray Jerome James
Assuming that Luol Deng is back soon from his “early anterior tibial stress fracture” Chicago’s bench can be quite potent. The trade for John Salmons and Brad Miller brought them exactly what they were missing: a scorer of the bench and a big man who can make plays for others. Hinrich is the Bull’s best perimeter defender and is big enough to defend both guard spots when needed. And there is always pesky Lindsey Hunter who always seems to come up with out-of-nowhere defensive plays in big games, unfortunately for the Bulls there might not be any big games.
6. Houston Rockets
Point Guard Kyle Lowry; Shooting Guard Von Wafer Brent Barry Tracy McGrady; Small Forward ; Power Forward Carl Landry Chuck Hayes Brian Cook; Center Dikembe Mutombo Joey Dorsey

The trade of Rafer Alston to Orlando not only released Aaron Brooks but it brought over Kyle Lowry. As Lowry has become more comfortable with the Rockets’ offense he has displayed the ability to run it fluidly off the bench. Landry has continued his spectacular play from last season, and has shown he can shoulder a good portion the load with McGrady out (Houston do us a favor and cut ties with Mr. Injury, as odd as it might sound, you are better without him and more fun to watch-you’re 22-8 without him this season, I’m just saying.) And no list about bench players would be complete without at least one of the Barry brothers on it would it?
5. Portland Trail Blazers
Point Guard Sergio Rodriguez Jerryd Bayless; Shooting Guard Rudy Fernandez; Small Forward Travis Outlaw Martell Webster; Power Forward Channing Frye Shavlik Randolph Michael Ruffin; Center Raef LaFrentz Greg Oden
Red Rover Red Rover send Greg Oden right over. No wait stop he might get hurt running through the interlocked arms of 6th graders (tell me you didn’t just picture Oden running over toward the line of what looks like midgets, tripping over their arms and face planting). Since Oden has proved he is unable to stay healthy, the Blazers front line is wicked thin with Channing Frye as the lone reliable reserve. Rudy Fernandez has be crazy consistent displaying that it was worth the wait to bring him over from Spain. Travis Outlaw is third on the team in scoring and along with Fernandez provides the spark off the bench. The backup point guard spot is shaky at best with Rodriquez and Bayless getting less and less time, as the games get more important expect the rotation to nix these two all together and just play Roy even more at the point.
4. Utah Jazz
Point Guard Brevin Knight Ronnie Price; Shooting Guard Kyle Korver Morris Almond; Small Forward Andrei Kirilenko Matt Harpring; Power; ForwardPaul Millsap; Center Kosta Koufos Jarron Collins Kyrylo Fesenko
With God working on Cleveland’s behalf to sabotage Boozers contract season Paul Millsap has come off the bench to provide the inside scoring and rebound to complement Deron Williams and Okur. Kirlilenko provides a little bit of everything off the bench–although not worth what they are paying him–and Korver is the deadeye shooter every bench team needs. When Williams was injured Price and Knight filled in adequately, but don’t look for them to do much as long as he’s healthy. The Jazz biggest problem off the bench is their backup centers who aren’t worth the four apples and a Mormon virgin they are being paid.
3. Boston Celtics
Point Guard Stephon Marbury Gabe Pruitt; Shooting Guard Eddie House J.R. Giddens Tony Allen; Small Forward Bill Walker; Power Forward Glen Davis Leon Powe Brian Scalabrine; Center Mikki Moore
Some have equated the pickups of Marbury and Moore with last season’s veteran signings of Sam Cassell and P.J. Brown. Please. That is like comparing Jennifer Aniston to Rosanne Barr, because they are both female–allegedly. However, the signing of Starbury and Moore have upgraded the bench. While Stephon is getting all the attention his impact will come in the form of one or two big plays, not consistent contribution-some might argue he will implode the team, however I don’t see that happening, not with KG on the team. Moore on the other hand could quietly become the big pick-up. He adds the Celtic bench one thing they were missing: Length. He also plays with a motor that fits in well with Doc’s style. The other parts of Boston’s bench we know what we are going to get, House will shoot, a lot, but not defend a soul. Davis and Powe produce on offense in a sneaky fashion that has every announcer astonished they can even score. However, they still haven’t replaced James Posey as the reliable shooter and solid defender off the bench, which could become a factor assuming they play the LeBrons in the Conference Finals.
2. San Antonio Spurs
Point Guard George Hill Jacque Vaughn; Shooting Guard Manu Ginobili Malik Hairston; Small Forward Bruce Bowen Ime Udoka; Power Forward Kurt Thomas Drew Gooden; Center Fabricio Oberto Ian Mahinmi
Manu Ginobili inflates the bench numbers for the Spurs the way fake breasts inflate a model’s weight, and while some argue he plays in the crunch time like a starter, he still averages less than 30 min a game; plus who am I to squabble with Gregg Popovich? The addition of Drew Gooden could be huge for the Spurs. When healthy he should fill the role Oberto was supposed to play, as an energy guy off the bench and a decent low post scorer. He will also take some of the load off Kurt Thomas who, for all his savvy, is starting to show his age. Everyone has been waiting for George Hill to get the ire of Popovich, and while he hasn’t overwhelmed, he fits the Spurs style by playing solid defense and not taking terrible shots. However it doesn’t help that Bruce Bowen is aging faster than Marcus Brody in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
1. Los Angeles Lakers
Point Guard Jordan Farmar Sun Yue; Shooting Guard Sasha Vujacic Shannon Brown; Small Forward Trevor Ariza Adam Morrison; Power Forward Josh Powell; Center D.J. Mbenga Andrew Bynum

I wanted to avoid putting the Lakers here. I truly hate watching this group game after game let leads be whittled down on their watch. But there were two things that kept them here 1) lack of another standout group (I couldn’t put a bench with Marbury up here, and Bruce Bowen’s jump shot flattening by the day is no comforting factor either) and 2) Phil Jackson sticking with his bench when 92.8% of other coaches would have pulled the plug. Josh Powell demonstrated he can play well in short minutes at the forward spot. Farmar and Ariza are inches away from being starters and at certain points look like they should be. Plus, the Lakers shed the dead weight that was Chris Mihm and Vladimir Radmanovic, and even with Bynum’s injury they have been able to plug along without counting solely on Kobe. You could make any number of arguments as to why they shouldn’t be up here, but when you boil down the Lakers’ bench you have everything you want: shooter (Vujacic), solid ball handler(Farmar), lockdown defender (Ariza), lengthy forward (Powell) and a big man who is good for six fouls in case you play Shaq (Mbenga). When it comes playoff time and the starters’s minutes are increased these players will be able to focus on what they do best during short sperts. And if something happens to one of the starters they’ve been given enough playing time during the season to step in and contribute. So while the Lakers’ backup shooting guard stands in the long line of famous people named SASHA (copyright Rick Warren), which starts at the White House, L.A.’s bench is at the front of this playoff train.
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Kevin Patra lives by the adage: Those who can’t do, teach, and those who can’t do or teach, write. Currently, he is a graduate student at the University of Southern California studying Online Journalism, after spending four years at the University of Michigan obtaining a bachelors degree from the school of Language, Science & Fun. Patra still owns a teal Grant Hill jersey and is looking for his old FILA basketball shoes.
*edited where necessary for injury purposes
**Assuming Luol Deng returns in the immediate future
Related posts:
- ⊚ Taking one for the team
- ⊚ The Top-5 Western Conference All-Stars (of my era)
- ⊚ The Top-5 Eastern Conference All-Stars (of my era)
- ⊚ Shaqtus Leads Suns to Victory Over Kobe’s Lakers
- ⊚ Fisher Sets the Stage for Kobe








fuck marbury!